Gender Focus By: Pauline Banda

A Kitwe husband has rejected his wife’s plea for him to write a Will. He claims that doing so would “expedite” his death.

Writing a will has been a highly contentious social issue in Africa where discussing or even thinking about the possibility of death is almost taboo.

But the fact is come what may, death just like birth, is a fact of life and we all know that it can happen any time-usually when we least expect it.

It comes like a thief in the night.Death has surprised us several times.

People have started off from home and ended up in fatal accidents on the way to work. Others have just collapsed and died.Death is a mystery we have to anticipate at all times. Grim as it may be, it is a reality.
We all want to live.

Life is God’s most precious gift. Life is good but at one time, it has to come to an end. It is not up to us to dictate when and how we will die.

This is the secret of the Most High God. We have absolutely no control over it.

The only thing we can do is prepare for those we are likely to leave behind.

We must do this to save them the trouble of dealing with “vultures’’ gunning for instant wealth as soon as we are gone.

We all know how rife property grabbing is in our midst.

It has been worsened by various factors, including poverty and plain greed.

The incidence might have gone down but property grabbing is still very much with us.

I am having problems to understand why the Kitwe husband is resisting the brilliant idea of writing a will. It does not take much.

One just needs to consult a lawyer if they do not know how to go about it.

It must be as simple as drinking water but just the thought of it really depresses some people.

The Kitwe wife says she wrote her will two years ago and has been persuading her husband to do the same since.

The pleas have fallen on deaf ears. I wonder why. It is not like she is asking him to do something she has not done.

The couple runs a successful business and both of them have invested substantially in it for the past ten years.

The wife is not sure what would happen should he pass on.She wants to be sure, which is why she has been insisting that her husband writes a will.

I think he must and anyone who has any income or assets of some kind has an obligation to save their families the trauma of sorting out the assets should anything happen.Of course there are other legal provisions for those who don’t leave any wills behind but they are a lot more cumbersome and tedious.

The lack of a will usually creates unnecessary anxiety and squabbling, even if other legal provisions exist. There is a very dangerous misconception about wills. The subject is almost regarded as unAfrican.
This is wrong.

A will simply makes life easier for the surviving spouse and family. It reduces their grief and burden. It is much easier for a surviving spouse to grieve, knowing that she or he does not have to fight over assets because a clear cut will was deposited with a lawyer.

Writing a will is not Western. It is just about good planning. We have to change our attitude towards an idea so good, easy and helpful.In this era, the death rate is high and the causes vary. Death is death and it does not really matter how one dies. The process is the same.

It would do us a lot of good as a community to live knowing that when we are gone, our children will not have to start costly court proceedings over their own property.Of course death is bad.

Most people are scared of it but the fact that it is part of life should encourage us to cast it in different light, to make it more acceptable.

Whether we like it or not, we will die, so it makes no sense to be in perpetual denial about the inevitable.It is in our own interest as a society to look at death as part of life. It has been happening since time immemorial.I know about Africans and superstition but sometimes, we take things too far.

All human beings are superstitious but in Africa we tend to go beyond, infact too far for our own good.It does not make sense to believe that one might die early if they write a Will. That is not true. We all have our time.

It is just that we don’t know and we don’t have to know anyway. It would make life so complicated, if each one of us knew when we would die. I like the way some people in the West treat life. A will is almost a must for the working class and anyone who has some assets to their names.

They know that they can die any minute and don’t they do meticulous wills! They put in all the details some people would normally overlook.I am very much alive to cultural differences between the West and ourselves but as we are always reminded, culture is dynamic. We must move with time.Often, our insistence on maintaining some cultural beliefs has cost us dearly.

It does not hurt to adopt practices, which will benefit our communities and make them better places to live in.Some Westerners even go a step further to plan their own funerals.

They buy burial grounds and cater for everything, from food for mourners, transport and caskets.It might be unheard of in Zambia to plan one’s own funeral but at the rate we are going, we would do well to do so, if we have the means.

For those who are not able, it is understandable if they don’t bother themselves with such plans. Life insurance is critical for those who have some extra income.

Obviously we don’t expect people who are struggling to buy a meal to even think of life insurance.I am talking about people with the means, people whose death has the potential to ignite family strife.

Planning for death is not exactly a Western concept.I read a Magazine story about some South Africans doing the same. South Africa is so close to Zambia. I don’t see why we cannot adopt such good ideas.

I know of people whose families have to solicit for handouts when a close family member dies. They ask not because they cannot afford but because the deceased and family did not do any planning at all.

We can avoid some of these mishaps by doing some basic planning. In an economy like ours, it might be difficult to save money but the truth is that saving is not part of our culture and this has proved perilous many a time.

Most of us have no disposable income. We must just try to make it a habit to put away something, for “that rainy day.”I hope anyone planning to write a will can do so without undue delays. It is a very good thing to do.

For those who have not thought about it, let them start now. It is never too late.Death will come some day.

I like a saying I have been hearing lately. Some creative person coined it. It goes like this: It does not matter how you treat the world, you will never come out alive.

I am sorry to remind the readers about this grim reality but I had to, lest we forget.

Pauchola@yahoo.com,
P.O BOX 31421,
Lusaka.
Telefax: 221364/225881